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Are You Lawrence? The Epitome Of The Millennial Dating Experience

Issa Rae’s hit show Insecure is the real life manifestation of Solange’s “F.U.B.U.”

The show is truly one that has something for everyone, but has everything for us. I don’t think you can find a show that is for the black community where art imitates life as accurately as Insecure does.

By now I’m pretty sure you all know all about the #LawrenceHive. Ever since the show’s inception, Lawrence was always a character that piqued the audience’s interest. He seemed to be your pretty every day, dashingly handsome and witty guy – much like myself. We knew it was too good to be true. Here’s a friendly dude who seems into and committed to his woman in regards to fidelity. What could possibly be wrong with him?

It turned out that he didn’t seem to be the most motivated guy who had grown severely complacent at a time. Once we as viewers learn this fact, the dynamic of this show totally shifts. The imperfection of Lawrence makes this relationship all that more tangible. It’s at this point Lawrence begins to elicit the most visceral of reactions via Twitter and beyond.

This begins to keep us glued.

I’m of the belief that we become glued because this relationship between Issa and Lawrence at one point or another depicts relationships of our pasts. Their story is nuanced and is still developing. What could it possibly be about Lawrence that evokes our tweets and discussions? I say it’s because Lawrence represents different types of men that are all encompassed in his character. These types are ones that women are familiar with and some men are familiar being. Let’s take a gander shall we?

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“Lazy Dude”

Let’s be frank, there are varying views on how folks label Lawrence’s time spent between jobs. He’s been called unmotivated and complacent. I think that Issa was patient with him but he just didn’t show enough initiative at a time. Eventually she viewed him as just being lazy.
Well, women hate lazy dudes. Some women have stayed with lazy dudes in the hopes that their habits may brush off on their man. Many times this is to no avail. As Lawrence represents a deadbeat lazy dude to some, he also garners strong reactions throughout social media. In as much as he was the person cheated on in this show, pity for him goes out the window once it’s remembered that dude was sitting on his ass for seemingly a considerable amount of time.
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“Too Little Too Late Dude”

Most women will justify Issa’s cheating because they believed Lawrence wasn’t an engaged partner in the relationship. Not only did they view him as complacent professionally, but he seemed wishy washy with his duties as a boyfriend.
In a nutshell, Lawrence has also been viewed as inconsistent. Besides lack of honesty, inconsistency might be the next thing women hate most. It can be argued that Lawrence’s inconsistency led to Issa’s tryst. Women are all too familiar with men wanting to get right once they’ve probably gone off of the deep end already. In short, Lawrence just wasn’t moving fast enough for Issa in their eyes. When the ladies see this, it gets more vitriol spewed towards Lawrence.
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“Emotionally Confused Dude”

Tasha is essentially a woman that was throwing Lawrence vibes as he was still with Issa. He was initially applauded for remaining faithful. He was being applauded for doing something he should’ve been doing. But in today’s society, there are no optics for that kind of behavior.
Women aren’t experiencing fidelity often enough, and there isn’t enough depiction of it in our entertainment.
It was refreshing to see Lawrence not succumb to temptation. Seeing as the relationship between Lawrence and Issa ended abruptly, Tasha enters stage left. The issue is that Tasha really digs Lawrence but Lawrence is essentially on the rebound. Naturally there will be a disparity in where these two see things going ultimately. This is further illustrated when Lawrence hits the skins with Issa for an impromptu quickie.
Lawrence simply was doing too much too soon. Now he is in a position where he is leading two women on. Women have an idea where this is going and so do the fellas. It doesn’t conjure up the best of memories which is why it elicits the types of discussions that it does.

These points speak to a bigger theme.

Lawrence represents many of the imperfections that we experience in modern day dating. Inconsistency, laziness, and leading people on are all big no no’s in relationships. Women can’t grasp why men are up in arms over Issa’s cheating. They look at all the demerits that I listed above and say “he had it coming.”
Men can relate to Lawrence because for those of us that have been done wrong, we know the feeling of just wanting to get back on the saddle and moving on. Seeing him have sex with a new woman after the break up…in the crib that he and Issa inhabited was the best. It gave the fellas a feeling of triumph that only we could understand. It sort of felt like man, finally, we got one! Lawrence could be the most complex character on the show due to him being able to resonate with both men and women. He is the reminder of the kind of man to try to be and not to be in the same breath. We all have good and bad qualities. He is as human as we all are which is why we have invested so much in his actions.
These are my words and I make no apologies.
What is your experience with a Lawrence? Share your story in the comments below.
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About DamnPOPS

Pops is a staff writer currently at Brooklyn Buttah that's hoping to bring material that people can connect with. If it's a touchy subject, expect him to speak on it. You may have seen him featured on sites such as Single Black Male and Madame Noire. This Brooklynite has a passion to captivate people with words. Roll with him on this trip.

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