Mercury Retrograde is approaching (starting on December 19) and it gives us three weeks to slow down, plan our next moves, and reassess priorities.
You may not believe in astrology, and that’s fine; just notice any happenings around this time, whether it is an old friend popping up, your computer is acting funny, or a big load of miscommunications, blame the retrograde.
Particularly around this time, random past lovers pop up.
And I mean, literally, randomly out of nowhere. That ex from three years ago just text you “Hey Big Head,” and now your phone is glaring at you.
So what do you do when an ex pops up being casual? You just want to remind them how much they hurt you, how much they turned your mental upside down, and you want them to feel the way you did.
But, we’re better people now and we are not in charge of someone’s karma.
Most of the time, exes want to know if they are replaced or if we’re still sprung over them. Or, if your ego is enormous like mine, you get satisfaction knowing they’re stuck on you and haven’t moved on. Important advice is to let them think whatever they want by not even answering (or asking) the question.
It may be hard because you want them to see how great you’re doing without them, but I promise they will know from seeing you unbothered, or from lurking your social media. We tend to linger a hand over Pandora’s Box because of What Ifs. Leave the What Ifs alone!
A tried-and-true method is ignoring. Really, if you do not want to be bothered, there’s nothing wrong with not answering. Act like it didn’t even happen. But if you’re like me and the other 82% of the world, we hear that notification screaming us in the face, and we feel this need to respond.
On that note, there’s this tip.
My aunt taught me the remedy: Kill Them with Kindness. When someone wrongs us, they do not expect a reply or sharing anything with them. They get so surprised at us indulging in conversation that a guilt trip may even happen. Keeping the conversation short and sweet is your best bet. You don’t have to tell them your new life story, but let them know you’re great.
We wonder what is new with this person’s life, whether they miss us or they want us back. When there’s no pressure or animosity, they are reminded why they cared or liked you in the first place. Nothing has to come from this; continue to go your separate way.
However, if you decide to meet up with your ex, be cautious. Ask yourself if it’s worth your sanity; especially someone who caused you a lot of stress and heartache.
Exes change, it’s true, but do they really? They’re an ex for a reason.